“Which of you is the ‘lady?’” (Part II Ch. 5, p 136)
It’s the funniest thing when straight people find out my lover and I are gay. In social settings, invariably, a straight person, after a few cocktails of course, hunches over and dares to whisper to another loudly enough so we can hear: “Which one of them do you think is the ‘lady?’”
I hunch back over and matter-of-factly state: “Neither.” Oddly, this dumbfounds them. Brows crinkle.
The question arises from the heavy media imagery of gay men as ‘girls.’ Most hear the word ‘gay’ and think female acting when, in fact, most gay men are more masculine-defined in nature, character, and essence. If two men are gay, then as a gay couple, one is the man and the other is, well, the man. Men don’t become other sexed because they’re gay! Even in same-sex marriages, legally, two men are two husbands not husband and wife. It seems to me what nosy buggers like that really want to know is ‘Who’s taking dick?’ Presumptively, that would define the “lady.” …